The rise and fall of the 1.21st Streich.
a History by Captain Fat Elvis
See also by CFE:
the intercepted encoded messages sent by wireless
instant messenger at the outbreak of war
captured high security documents
intercepted post-match debriefing
It started with sporadic skirmishes between Dr Jeep, Captain Fat
Elvis and various irregular forces. Of the few reports that have
landed on the desk here at divisional H.Q. even fewer have made
coherent sense. Some garbled reports from Elvis seemed to be trying
to ask for reinforcements of infantry, some big tanks (but that
could have be a report about big tanks attacking) and a resupply
of ammo and beer. What is know from reports posted on uk champ site
is that Elvis lost many units in protracted mortar duel with an
as yet unidentified enemy.
Then a little later in the evening Dr Jeep broke radio silence in
an effort to reinforce Elvis with beer, he at the time having just
over run the Kronenburg factory in the East of france and had dangerous
amount of continental larger to dispense a.s.a.p. In a display of
blatant disregard of divisional protocol he headed for Amsterdam
where he believed Elvis to be.
Finally at about 11pm evening time after much confusion (Elvis was
in fact in Hamburg not Amsterdam) and some dropped and unentered
battles Dr Jeep and Elvis met up in one of the less decorated areas
of the above great city. We know the above information because of
a report of an anonymous clan member who logged on to AIM just as
Dr Jeep and Elvis were heading off to battle again having grabbed
essential supplies on there way.… Reports from and about Dr Jeep
then stopped coming in although at one stage a woman's voice was
heard using Dr Jeeps enigma variation code, all thought we listen
hard with our ears to the radio speakers all we could hear was laughter
breaking glass and sporadic small arms fire.
Finally Dr Jeep and Elvis decided to do some protracted night time
training exercised using a mixture of live and blank ammo, after
more than an hour those units that had survived felt they were much
better off for the training and would pose a greater threat next
time they met the enemy. It was decided to call a halt to the battle
due to it now being past 3 in the morning and due to the battle
having turned into a long drawn out game of creeping barrage and
obsessively lain mine fields. When a truce was agreed both Elvis
and Dr Jeep shot the wounded and went back to Amsterdam via Hamburg.
At this point we received our first real news about the pair. Unfortunately
this report came from the military police. As I write this account
Dr Jeep and Elvis are still in custody but the division is pulling
all strings pullable to get the two out of jail and ready to for
tonight's Clan/Division meeting. The report from the arresting officer
said "at approximately 3:45 the Defendants were seen driving a turbo
charged panzer lutze 20mm backwards over a line of staff limos parked
outside a 'gentleman's club' as they reversed at speed, they were
throwing empty and full bottles of kronenburg at anything that didn't
move and shouted "BEER AND HONOUR!" whilst being supplied with more
beer bottles empty, full, opened and unopened by three women who
were also eventually arrested.
Fortunately the limos were empty and no one was hurt. The five occupants
of the tank were finally arrested when they blew a hole in the side
of an empty building with the 20mm gun and then proceed to drive
into the said building which itself proceeded to fall on top of
them. it was as they stumbled staggered and swerved out of the building
one at a time, covered in beer and dust, that Dr Jeep was heard
to say something about digital destruction, anglepoise lambs and
the nature of post modern society. He then proceeded to divest one
of his young lady friends at which point we arrested him. whilst
being supported by the other to women Captain Fat Elvis was adamant
that the limos had driven under the tank and that they had only
entered the building to look for stationery.
See also by CFE:
the intercepted encoded messages sent by wireless
instant messenger at the outbreak of war
captured high security documents
intercepted post-match debriefing
